she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I did not marry a roomba.
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