I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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