What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
