Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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