Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
