i don't plan on having that self control this summer
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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