hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
You've changed since you got that strap on
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
