Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
