Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
