after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
