I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
