There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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