im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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