Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
