do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize