just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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