i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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