How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
