Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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