At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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