big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
it's great music for shaving your balls
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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