Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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