what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
