Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
