Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
