we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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