Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
