Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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