they need to just BURY HIM!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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