i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Randomize
