I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
