Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
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