she woke up with a sticky ear
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
