You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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