New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Ketchup is God's man juice
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
