no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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