Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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