can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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