I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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