Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize