I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
