it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You are the jesus of drinking
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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