hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
