return my video game
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
two words...techno handjob
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
