Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
