Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
