$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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