Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
