I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
