did you get engaged???
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
